A Peek Into Anahera's Psyche

Posted on Wed Apr 30th, 2025 @ 5:37am by Lieutenant JG LuAnn Lovegood & Lieutenant Commander Anahera Chernova

1,232 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: Preservation Instinct
Location: USS Ontario - Counsellor's Office

The pills from the doc had worked, but she still had to get to the bottom of what was causing her bad dreams.

She'd booked an appointment with Lieutenant Lovegood and now stood outside her door.

Anahera adjusted her uniform and pressed the buzzer.

"Come in," LuAnn called. Her office had warm blue walls with cheerful yellow accents. A fresh bowl of flowers sat on a table between a couch and two chairs. She thought it helped the office look both calming and happy at the same time.

"Good day, Counselor, thank you for agreeing to see me." Anahera said as she entered the office. "Oh, I love the flowers, and blue walls, the yellow's a bit bright for my tastes."

"I like how cheerful the color is," she said, removing the yellow pillows from the couch. "But I can set them aside for now. I'm always available to talk. Please, have a seat and tell me why you made an appointment."

"Thank you." Anahera said taking the offered seat. "Well, I've been having disturbing dreams. They always begin the same, I'm in bed with an attractive young man. We're kissing, but something makes me open my eyes, and break the kiss. While he is still in my arms, I watch, unable to move, as he rapidly ages to dust." She paused a moment. "Then the voices start, beginning as whispers, finally becoming clear, some I recognize, some I don't, they are all accusatory though. They ask questions like, 'Why did you let me die?', and 'Why didn't you save me?' The last voice is that of a girl I loved on Occupied Bajor, she died at the hands of the Cardassians, when I was off world." A tear appeared in Anahera eye as she thought of Tela.

LuAnn nodded. "Tell me about these events in your life that are being mirrored in your dream."

"Before enlisting in Starfleet, I was a mercenary and smuggler." Anahera began. "I'd only take jobs that aligned with my conscience. Smuggling food and other supplies to Bajoran during the Occupation, or defending fledgling colonies from Klingon or Orion raiders, for example. I killed a lot of people, but saved a lot more."

LuAnn nodded. She'd talked to several Starfleet officers and enlisted personnel over the years who had similar backgrounds before they chose to join Starfleet. "I believe that you have unresolved emotions about something in your past. Or perhaps an amalgamation of several events. Have you lost people you cared about? Or do you feel responsible for someone's death?"

"I've lost my father, husband, my son, my daughter-in-law, my girlfriend and several friends, when you live as long as I have, it’s inevitable you'll lose people, but these were almost all under violent circumstances." Anahera said. "I feel responsible for all of them except my father, his death was my mother's fault, she left us, and he drank himself to death."

"That's not her fault. He chose to drink to that extent," LuAnn countered. "We are all responsible for our actions and our reactions." She looked at Anahera for a moment. "Which of those deaths still haunt you?"

"The death of my son, my husband, my daughter-in-law and my girlfriend. The deaths of my family, were because we stood up to Orion gangsters, they sabotaged the shuttle, that my family was taking to Earth. Drunk Cardassians saw, Tela as a disposable plaything, not a beautiful, loving being." Anahera sighed. "I found those that were responsible, in both cases, and killed them, it didn't stop the guilt or the pain, it didn't solve anything, it just made me a cold blooded murderer." She added.

"And you have yet to forgive yourself for what you did." It wasn't a question. LuAnn could hear it in her voice and see it on her face. "How often do you have the nightmares?"

"On occasion, I haven't had them for a few years." Anahera said. "I am unsure why they are back."

"That, I believe, is an important step to stopping them. The most obvious is that something from our recent trip triggered them. But the question is, if that's the case, what?" She raised an eyebrow as she again looked at Anahera. "Do you have any ideas?"

"Stress has brought them on in the past." Anahera said.

"Have you been taught stress management? There are exercises, mental techniques, and relaxation exercises that might help when your stress gets out of control." LuAnn still felt it was tied to what happened on the planet triggering memories from Anahera's past, but regardless of the cause, these suggestions could help.

"I've tried, but it’s difficult for me to quieten my thoughts." Anahera said.

"Okay. There are several things that may help. Not everything works for everyone, but we can begin with these. We can try exposure therapy if you wish. That involves using the holodeck to recreate the trauma and help you slowly learn to cope with it. Psychotherapy, or talking through your traumas, can also help you learn to deal with your past. Cognitive therapy is another option. That uses stress management, relaxation, and other techniques to help you relax and sleep." She paused and considered Anahera for a moment. "What hobbies do you enjoy?"

"I'm a bit of a collector, I collect weapons. I also enjoy poker and chess, and other games that test my tactical skills. I'm proficient in several martial arts and as a qualified engineer, I like to tinker with things." Anahera said. "I also enjoy a fine whiskey."

"Have you tried any of those before bed to help you relax? Martial arts or tinkering with a project can help your mind relax before bed. So can a glass of whisky." LuAnn smiled. "I sometimes recommend skinny dipping in the moonlight. It's quite relaxing."

"I'll try those, but, in my experience, skinny dipping in the moonlight is more fun with a friend." Anahera said.

LuAnn grinned. "It is, but that's an entirely different kind of relaxation." She considered Anahera, her head cocked to one side. "Let's start with journaling and meditation. Every night, write down how your day went, both the good and bad. If you have a nightmare, write it down, too. Before bed, do something to relax. Read, meditate, exercise, practice a martial art. See if that helps at all. Come back here in one week and we'll evaluate your progress. If you don't have any, we'll move on to cognitive therapy, but I'm hoping that, since it's been so long, this will help. I don't expect the problem to go away, but if it's lessened, then we're on the right track. Use what pills the doctor gave you if you need them as well."

"Will do, LuAnn." Anahera said. "Would you like to join me for a night cap?"

"Yes, now that we're done with the session. We could see who else is in the lounge." LuAnn enjoyed visiting with people and she enjoyed just watching others.

Anahera smiled. "People watching, what fun." She said.

"I find it fascinating." LuAnn grinned. "You can learn a lot about a person by just watching them. And the lounges are a perfect place to do so."

"Let's go then." Anahera said raising from her chair.

OFF

Lieutenant Commander Anahera Chernova
Chief Security/Tactical Officer
USS Ontario

Lieutenant JG LuAnn Lovegood
Counselor
USS Ontario

 

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