Part II -- Walking the Ravens

Posted on Thu May 8th, 2025 @ 3:33am by Lieutenant Amanda Rose & Lieutenant Xavier

1,167 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: Preservation Instinct
Location: Deck 15 | Arboretum | USS Ontario
Timeline: Post --Roller-coaster Shuttle Ride

[PREVIOUSLY ON Walking the Ravens...]

"Hypothetically speaking, if someone feels that they have always been thrown away, I would want to know why someone has that feeling so that I could help that person determine if that person is considering all possibilities. Even if everything that person had experienced was true and completely accurate, I certainly would want to help said person understand that his or her past experiences do not mean that other actors are going to treat him or her similarly."

"Hmmm. One further question. How would one know if...one party has feelings that go beyond friendship?"

"Is that hypothetical?" Amanda asked, raising her eyebrows.


[AND NOW THE CONTINUATION....]


"Of course. I am a curious being."

"I see," Amanda replied, allowing Xavier the lies. "Well, hypothetically speaking, such people would be sharing their deepest secrets. They would have their own language, their own jokes, their own comforts. There would be an instinctual understanding of each other most of the time. The day would not feel complete without speaking to that person and if one did not, then there would be a noted and potentially uncomfortable absence. Hypothetically, of course."

"I see.... Fascinating." He looked at Amanda. "Thank you, that was very helpful." He looked around. "I should head out...." He let out a huff. "Deimos, where is your brother?" He looked around, worry creasing his brow. "Counselor may I ask you to keep an eye on Deimos while I find Phobos?"

"Of course." Amanda looked at the bird and wondered how in the world she was going to keep the bird here. She offered a hand to Deimos, hoping that was the right thing to do.

"Thank you." He stood and headed out.

Shortly after there was a tap on the counselor's ankle. From under the bench a little blue-eyed Raven popped out. In his beak he held a small paper that looked to have been folded into a tiny square. The bird seemed to look around before hopping up on the bench and dropping the note then taking flight.

The Counselor did not recognize the tap at first. She reached down and scratched her ankle only to feel the tap again. "Oh, it is you, Phobos. What do you have there?" When the bird dropped the note, Amanda decided to open it. Yes, the bird was somehow connected with Xavier, but the bird clearly wanted her attention. Maybe it was a note from Xavier. With that logic, she took the paper and unfolded it carefully.

Phobos being quite the little thief had managed to slip the letter out from the pages of Xavier's book while the counselor had occupied his attention. He watched the human with intelligent eyes from a tree as she read.

My Dearest KERBEROS,

For fifteen years we've shared council.
I know not your name, or what ship serves as your home yet I know that my heart only beats to receive your letters. In addition to the messages we send I have been writing you like this, letters I could never send, letters I have no courage to send containing the truths of my heart.

I wish to inform you again of my fondness for you. I dare not tell you in person for fear you will find me lacking. I have no words to name how I feel, and I can only tell you that my heart beats only to receive your messages. When they come, they bring joy and a heart that hammers out of control. When they do not come, a deep melancholy roots itself deep in my soul and fear takes hold.

I hope that you will one day understand why we cannot meet. It is not due to a fault of yours but one of mine. I feel unworthy and scared that just as with all those whom I cared about you will turn away and shatter my soul. You once told me that the strongest hearts have a thousand scars yet mine is so scared that I fear it will never be whole. It has been broken so many times, yet nothing has managed to wound me deeper than the mere thought that you would find me lacking and turn from me.

Before you, loneliness was a welcome companion. If you go then I do not think myself strong enough to face the loneliness again. I have nothing to offer, and I do not know if I can give you the love you deserve, there are times I do not know what the word even means but you make me wat to try.

Yours always
PLUTO


"Kerberos? Pluto?" she asked aloud. "Do you know what this means, Phobos?" the counselor asked the raven suspiciously. Oh, like the raven can answer you, Amanda. You're being ridiculous.

Phobos nudged the book towards the counselor as if telling her to open it.

"What are you doing?" Amanda asked the raven. She looked down at the book. This raven can't be telling me to look inside, can it? She looked everywhere for Xavier and then feeling the fool, she opened the cover of the book. Worst case scenario, she would get a summary of a new book to read.

Inside was a note.

Starfleet Letter Exchange Program

Requested Gift from KERBEROS to

To SLEP registration name PLUTO

"Oh, my!" Amanda exclaimed. "He is in love.... So who is this Kerberos?" she whispered to herself. Hastily, she put the book back down where it originally was. She then held out her hand to Phobos. "Good bird," she told it and wondered if it would allow her to pet it.

Phobos happily allowed her to pet him. The smart little bird tilted its head to the note and then the book as if telling her to put the letter back. He butted his head against her arm, happy that she understood.

Xavier's voice rang out closer this time as he called the bird. Having given the counselor a clue the bird took to flight. Perhaps his master would not be so sad now.

Hastily, Amanda put the note back and pushed the book to where it had been. She called to Xavier, "I believe that I found Phobos while you were gone."

Xavier arrived back. "Thank you, counselor." He watched as Phobos shamelessly strutted on the bench. "He likes you, Phobos is a difficult one to win." He paused. "Thank you for allowing me to get some advice on a few hypothetical situations. I appreciate the time."

"Any time you need me, I will be there." Amanda then replied cheekily, "And I think that you should remember that you're not supposed to skip mandatory sessions." She picked up her own book and said, "I think I can overlook it this once."

He sighed. "I shall attempt to...run away less."


====

Lieutenant Amanda Rose
Chief Counselor
USS Ontario

&

Lieutenant Xavier
Chief Flight Control Officer
USS Ontario

 

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